Stop Being Right: How the Best Leaders Ditch Certainty and Embrace Change
- kristian8120
- Oct 16
- 3 min read
We are taught, from a young age, that being confident in your answers is a sign of intelligence and strength. As you move up in leadership, this tendency hardens: the most senior person is often expected to be the most certain.
In a world that reinvents itself every month, being too certain sometimes is a trap. It keeps you stuck in yesterday's thinking.
The best leaders aren’t the ones who have all the answers. They're the ones who are quickest to question their old assumptions. The real challenge lies within having the guts to throw out the one that made you successful in the first place.
Different from second-guessing every move you make, it's about being humble enough to say, "I might be wrong here," and curious enough to find a better way. That's what really makes you fast, tough, and able to create something truly new.
Here is a practical framework for shifting your organisational culture from one of fixed conviction to one of continuous rethinking.
1. Detach Your Identity from Your Ideas
When a core idea is challenged, most of us feel a physical need to defend it. Why? Because we've unconsciously tied our personal identity to that idea. To admit the idea is wrong feels like admitting we are wrong.
The Fix: Adopt the Scientist Mindset.
The best way to combat this is to start viewing your core assumptions as hypotheses and not ideologies.
A scientist doesn't defend a hypothesis; they test it. They welcome evidence that proves them wrong, because being proven wrong means they now know something new. As a leader, you must model this: frame critical strategies as large-scale experiments you intend to run and test.
This simple shift changes the entire emotional dynamic of your meetings. A dissenting opinion stops being a personal attack and becomes valuable new data for the experiment.
2. Treat Feedback as a "Challenge Network"
If you are the leader, you are surrounded by people who are encouraged to agree with you. That's a natural, toxic comfort zone. You need people who are trusted and empowered to point out your flaws and critically examine and challenge your top ideas.
The Fix: Formalize Constructive Doubt.
Actively seek out individuals who possess confident humility. They believe in their ability to succeed but doubt their current approach might be the best one.
Reward the Critical Examiner: When someone on your team raises a valid, difficult objection to your plan, don't just thank them; publicly recognize their contribution as the highest form of team service. Show that their honesty genuinely led to a better outcome.
The "Pre-Mortem" Habit: Before launching any major project, dedicate a meeting to running a "pre-mortem." Ask the team to imagine the project has failed spectacularly a year from now, and then debate what specific decisions you made today were the cause of that failure. This safely forces the team to challenge the plan and each other.
3. Ask "How," Not Just "Why"
When you are trying to persuade someone to change their mind simply listing facts usually fails. People rarely change their mind just because they're shown they're wrong.
The Fix: Use Motivational Interviewing.
Instead of acting like a prosecutor trying to dismantle their arguments ("Why are you still using that old spreadsheet?"), act like a curious collaborator.
Ask open-ended questions focused on capacity and motivation:
"What obstacles do you see that prevent you from fully adopting this new system?"
"On a scale of one to ten, how confident are you in this plan, and what would move that number up by two points?"
"What is the next easiest step you could take to start testing the new process?"
By asking them to articulate their own reasons for resistance or their own pathway to change, you prompt them to
rethink their position internally. You aren't forcing the conclusion; you are giving them the tools to arrive at it themselves.
The Payoff of Unlearning
The next time you find yourself entirely certain about a direction, pause. Ask yourself: What evidence would convince me otherwise?
Are you ready to put your convictions to the test and build a team that can out-think the market?
Our leadership workshops are designed to embed this culture of rethinking, turning old habits into new, resilient systems.
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